The ‘Norm’

Most parenting stories start with two people meeting, falling in love and either deciding to have kids (or, I guess, accidently having kids)
And I suppose my decision to have children on my own with a donor is a break away from that ‘norm’.
Or is it?
My parenting story starts like most others, I met a man, we fell in love and we decided to have children.
However, after I got pregnant with our son, he left.
So that’s where the ‘norm’ ends, but it started like any other.
Now most people would, I guess, continue raising their son and wait for the love story to start again, to meet another man and decide to have kids with him.
My parenting story has started, and time was ticking, not my biological clock, as is normally mentioned in single mum by choice stories, but my sons.
I’ve always known I wanted my children close in age, that was the plan from the beginning, and the longer I waited for my next love story the bigger that age gap was growing.
It wasn’t my sons fault that he wasn’t growing up in the dream family, mum, dad, 2.4 kids and a dog, so why, when it was completely in my control should I deprive him of what I COULD give him of that?
He has a mum. Not a perfect one, but one who’s trying her best, and he has a dog (and a cat) whom he loves (sometimes too tightly) I can’t force a man to join our little tribe, I’m afraid that one is out of my control, but children I could do. I could add to our little family.
So to me it didn’t seem like a crazy decision, it seemed like the next logical step in building my family without the surprise arrival of prince charming.

Since I went public (in my real life) about the fact these babies are from a sperm donor and that I am going it alone, I haven’t had a single negative comment.
Mostly shock, yes, it’s not a standard announcement, but nothing negative.
Lots of ‘good on you’s and lots of ‘you’re very brave’ (I’m not sure if that’s directed at the on my own, or the twin thing!) I’m not sure if I am brave, or stupid, I guess I’ll find out in September!
And maybe that is a sign of the times and growing acceptance around different family setups, or maybe they’re all being negative behind my back, who knows, but I definitely haven’t had a single second of doubt or regret, I honestly believe that this decision is the right one for my current family, and, I hope my twins will grow up to believe it was the right decision for them, too. There’s plenty of love here to go around.

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  • An 'Angel Baby' is a baby lost during pregnancy or early childhood, who sleeps in the clouds instead of our arms.

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