So after weeks of feeling rubbish, only leaving the sofa for work and throwing up I scraped myself up and went for my viability scan today. This scan essentially shows that baby is there, in the right place and maybe, if you’re lucky, a heartbeat.
I wasn’t looking forward to this appointment, after three weeks of spotting I was pretty sure that something would have gone wrong, that baby would have stopped developing and all my symptoms would have been for nothing, so me and my mum sat in the waiting room nervously.
The sonographer was lovely and quickly got down to the scan. She turned the screen towards herself to start with and I closed my eyes and waited for the ‘I’m sorry’ but within a few seconds she said ‘so you had a double transfer’ I said ‘yes…’ and she goes ‘well you have two lovely babies in there…’ and she turned the screen towards me and you could clearly see both sacs and two little babies. She then focused on each in turn showing me their little ticking hearts and I relaxed. Mum pointed out that she hadn’t seen me that happy in months.
Now I know it was a risk that I would end up with twins with a double transfer, but it also increased the chances of atleast one of them sticking at all, which after all this time of failed treatments and false starts, seemed worth it to me, however I really didn’t expect them both to stick around!
This will be a challenge, as obviously it is only me, and I will now have two newborns to look after on my own, and it is extra pressure on my parents who will have the babies when I’m at work, this is something I am aware of and will have to make sure they don’t feel it’s too much for them, if it is I will have to rethink a few things…
Twins however come with advantages… they will always have each other, and knowing that their family is a little different I think this will really help them not to feel alone, and when the time comes to maybe contact their donor, they have each other who know exactly what they’re going through. It was always my plan to have two more babies, they just came on a BOGOF offer instead of four years apart as I was planning.
So now I have to keep those two little hearts beating for 7 more months and grow these two little aphids into beautiful babies. It will be added pressure on my body, but the hospital will keep a close eye on me so I have every hope that we will make it and that September will welcome two little bundles into my family.